Feeling "not enough" is often like carrying a persistent sense of inadequacy, as if no matter what you do or how hard you try, you’ll never quite measure up. It can feel like a deep, gnawing emptiness that no amount of external validation or success seems to fill. Often, it brings a sense of heaviness, a longing for acceptance and love, but with an underlying belief that these are somehow out of reach. It can also feel isolating and exhausting, as if you’re constantly battling an invisible standard you feel you can never meet.

To think you are "not enough," you may unconsciously hold beliefs like:

1. **"I'm inherently flawed."**  

   This can be a belief that something is wrong with you on a fundamental level — as if there's something about your personality, intelligence, or appearance that makes you less worthy than others.

2. **"My worth depends on what I achieve or how I perform."**  

   You may feel that to be valued, you have to constantly prove yourself through success, accomplishments, or validation from others. This belief turns self-worth into a currency that must be earned, not something you inherently have.

3. **"I’m unlovable or undesirable as I am."**  

   This is a painful belief that you’re somehow deficient in a way that makes you less deserving of love or acceptance. You might feel you have to "earn" love by being a certain way — maybe more attractive, accomplished, or likable.

4. **"Other people are more valuable or capable than I am."**  

   With this belief, you might look at others and see them as having qualities you lack. Whether it’s intelligence, beauty, charisma, or something else, it feels like other people have the "secret sauce" you’re missing.

5. **"Mistakes or flaws define my worth."**  

   Instead of viewing mistakes as part of growth, you may believe that every misstep or failure is evidence of your inadequacy. This can make you highly self-critical and fearful of trying new things because any failure feels like a personal indictment.

6. **"I don’t deserve good things."**  

   If you believe you’re not enough, you may feel that joy, love, success, or peace are things that others deserve but are out of reach for you.

7. **"I am responsible for everyone’s happiness and comfort."**  

   Sometimes, feeling not enough comes from a place of trying to take care of everyone else at your own expense. If you see your value only in terms of what you provide for others, you may believe that unless you're constantly giving, you're not worthy.

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Each of these beliefs can feed into a cycle that reinforces your sense of inadequacy. The way out often begins with self-awareness — recognizing these beliefs and understanding that they are learned, not truths. 

With compassion and practice, it’s possible to question and unlearn these beliefs and come to recognize that you’re inherently worthy, not because of what you do, but simply because you *are*.

I offer a 6 week Self Love program.